No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear. I am not afraid, but the sensation is like being afraid. The same fluttering in the stomach, the same restlessness, the yawning. I keep on swallowing… There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take in what anyone says. Or perhaps, hard to want to take it in. It is so uninteresting. Yet I want the others to be about me. I dread the moments when the house is empty. If only they would talk to one another and not to me — CS Lewis

The issues surrounding loss and grief fall into a unique category. Loss and grief can overlap with symptoms of anxiety, depression, and trauma, or one can be in a profound state of grief without these overlapping clinical symptoms. Loss and grief is an organic part of a life well lived.

Loss or grief may be triggered by current events that tap into childhood issues or from a previous unresolved relationship. These psychological processes may manifest as a slow drip or a tidal force that knocks you off of your feet. Different experiences in people’s lives induce feelings of loss, such as loss of a job, separation from a partner or spouse, a child for leaving home, the realization of time passing. Grief is the emotional response to death. It is important to access psychological and social support during this time.

When loss and grief begin to interfere with daily life then outside help may be necessary. Grief work is a dynamic process that is both personal and social. Loss and grief work entails making meaning of the loss, treating past and unresolved loss that links to the present one, processing the way these experiences are carried in the body and disrupts more active engagement.

I provide a sacred and safe space to learn how to silently sit in the discomfort of feeling, to find the undigested words not yet found but needed for you to stumble your way into connecting with life, to a more solid footing, and to a newly felt sense of meaning.

Theorists and researchers illuminate how our earliest experiences (womb and first two years) influence how we develop emotionally and physically. This is a sensitive time for the development our social brain. We learn how to manage our feelings, which include how we feel about ourselves. We internalize from our caretakers. We develop our ability to trust and to develop resources. These models of caretaking during these pivotal periods become the template for future relationships and our reaction to our losses (separation, divorce, death). In our later development this foundation can be further complicated or healed by changes in our parent-child, family-child, mentor-child relationships.

All of these factors, in turn, affect how we react to stress and sets the foundation for our physical health. If grief is inhibited by early traumatic experiences then rebuilding our sense of meaning and life structure becomes more difficult and can lead to what is called “traumatic bereavement.” The good news is that these past experiences can be healed. How our brains are wired can be re-wired due to its neuroplasticity and our inherited human ability transform.

I provide a safe, warm, non-judgmental and contained atmosphere for you to process your experiences, beliefs and emotions that may be contributing to the way your are mourning. I offer, in collaboration with you, feedback, recommendations and a treatment plan so that we may pursue the proper course of therapy and to re-evaluate them as the treatment progresses. 

I work collaboratively with you and with any outside professionals whom we feel should be a member of your treatment team (psychiatrists, primary care physicians, nurse practitioners, acupuncturists, and naturopathic doctors).

I am actively engaged in your therapy and an attentive listener, respectful of the space you wish or need to create. I provide a variety of therapeutic modalities based on my 30+ plus years of education, training, teaching and practice. 

In general, the goals of any good therapy is symptom reduction, gaining therapeutic techniques that you can apply outside of this office, and changing one’s internal landscape in order for growth, stabilization and self-regulation to occur. 

It is my honor to journey through your grief with you.

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and unspeakable love — Washington Irving